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Sex, Champagne and All Day Lie-ins for 2013

Sometimes you read a nugget about someone else’s lifestyle that brings you to your knees. In my case, slightly bizarrely, it was a heavy metal DJ talking about his weekends in the Guardian.

He talks about how he and his partner have no ‘little people’ in their lives so they can go clubbing in Brighton or Tonbridge Wells at a moment’s notice.

I’m not jealous of that – I’ve no desire to go to Brighton on a whim and would much rather spend Saturday nights like this one, 5 people crammed into one bed Charlie and the Chocolate Factory style, watching a film on Netflix, white sheets coated with biscuit crumbs.

But it was the description of how he spends Sundays that pulled me up sharp.

“Slow roast a lamb shoulder till it pulls apart and melts. While that’s roasting for hours have sex. Put a classic movie on in the background – The Big Lebowski, Withnail & I. Only get out of bed to check the oven or fetch more champagne.’

See what I mean? Ouch.

I remember whole Saturdays spent in bed but they seem far off and shrouded in the mists of time, almost alien, a bit like when your parents talk about their childhood.

Just as I was embarking on the annual detox, googling meditation courses and reading up on the Dukan Diet this DJ’s attitude has made me spin off in an entirely different direction. Life’s for living, right?

So instead of the usual self flagellation this year I’m taking up well-planned indulgence instead.

Resolution One: Book the children onto playdates, (preferably sleepovers) stay in bed all day, bottle of champagne compulsory.

Resolution Two: Going for gold in the Bedroom Olympics. Children at school, parents at home = no excuses.

Resolution Three: Spend whole days languorously cooking in the manner of Nigel and Nigella, stir-fries are so 2012

Resolution Four: Always keep champagne perfectly chilled in the fridge, ready to act on all of the above at a moment's notice.

Got to say, I’m liking January a whole lot better already.



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